"You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation." Plato
We help children who can't talk about their feelings. We help using their very first language- play. If you know a child who needs developmentally appropriate support please contact us to find out how we can help you.
Information and tips about play therapy and child mental health to help the children in your life. Learn about how to support a child in the classroom and at home. Find out about the latest research findings on child mental health. From time to time I will invite you to reflect on your inner child too as it's all related!
Parenting, child therapy, families, classroom support, play therapy
Free Play! A list of its profound benefits!
This month we are delighted to feature a guest post from Neve Spicer (of wetheparents.org). This is a great article to share with those who need reminding that play should be a priority along with an evidence based infographic! Enjoy and share with your friends for Play Therapy Week! ( 3rd Feb- 10th Feb 2019)
Modern science is now backing up what parents, educators and play therapists have known for eons. Children need to play.
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Top Children’s Books for the heart!
As well as puppets, sand, figurines, musical instruments, dress up toys and art materials, books are a well used resource in my play room as a play therapist. I am very selective on which books are allowed in and they must have a therapeutic purpose. Below are some of my most used and favourite books and they would make wonderful additions to your home (or teacher's/therapist's room).
Why You should really be writing to Santa too.
Yes you!
You’re not too old besides your inner child is more powerful than you think. If you choose not to listen to him/her (just like a outer world child) they will shout louder to get your attention (sometimes in unexpected ways e.g. sabotaging behaviour, relationship struggles, impulsive action, escapism or even physical health issues).
So this festive season I encourage you to join me in doing a quick easy fun task to tap into your inner child, connect to your self and your outer world (real life) child by following my easy peasy santa letter template.
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Following last month's article on cultivating your inner calm, this month we are focussing on when things have escalated and you haven't got any more calm to share (it happens to us all!). So this time we are focussing more specifically about not joining the chaos! Because let's face it, we can't always keep up with our calm cultivating practices (that we touched on in the last article). Sometimes it seems there's just a perfect storm of things going wrong and you get wound up. You are human after all.
First be sure to download your free printable refrigerator sheet that accompanies this article so you can easily put this into action!
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In the face of a little one struggling, it's our job to share our calm not join their chaos. As the saying by L.R. Knost goes.
But how can we muster or keep enough calm to share it?
Whether you're a parent, child therapist or teacher your patience is constantly being tested! Here are some tips I've found along the way of trying to share my inner calm!
This month's post is featuring some general maintenance/preventative measures for keeping your calm. Be sure to catch part 2 next month when I will be sharing strategies of keeping calm in those extra heated moments!
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TEACHERS! We salute you & we've got your back!
Forget the elves & Christmas fairies, the real heroes of Christmas are the teachers & school staff! They may not be featured heavily in typical Christmas movies but I see you! I acknowledge your daily mounting workload, the extra rehearsals, the overtime spent on elaborate displays, the strain on your voice as you try to contain the building excitement of 30+ buzzing children!
Teachers aren’t told enough how important they are. Most people can make an impact on a group of other people’s lives over their lifetime. For teachers, they impact thousands of lives!
SO… with this in mind, I hope you can add at least one of these tips to boost your self care this holiday season. You’re so close. You’ve got this!
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Life lessons from children!
I have had the great privilege to have worked in schools in Hong Kong over the last 9 years both as a teacher and as a play therapist. Working in schools can be intense and draining but also fun and inspiring! This is the first year I’ve not been working as part of a school and so I have some time to reflect on my experiences and celebrate the great lessons I’ve learnt from the little ones I’ve been blessed to work with!
1. Always be ready to have fun!
Sometimes I would see the children I taught as little coiled springs just waiting for their moment to spring out and bounce around! The sheer mention of the word “game” and I had at least 80% eyes on me (don’t ask what the other 20% were doing right now)! I think always being ready to have fun is a great way to live life. It brings enthusiasm, optimism and an excitement to the situation and those that are around you.
2. It's ok to cry
It happens! To girls AND boys and it’s nothing to be ashamed about. Tears come and the waves of sadness pass through. It’s always touching to see the natural empathy from school mates from such a young age.
3. Relationships are hard
Teachers far and wide will recognise this one...Often times what the child is complaining about in another child is the very same thing that they do, habitually! For example, the talkative kid tattle-tailing about another for talking! We dislike in others what we dislike in ourselves.
4. Self esteem and mindset are key!
Many bright children are held back by low self belief & emotional difficulties. This realisation was a big motivator for me retraining as a play therapist. Children with better positive support networks thrive. I have seen rapid rates of learning when a child is motivated and their needs are met.
5. "Get up every morning with a smile on your face and show the world all the love in your heart."
Ok I learnt that particular line off Carole King but it does play in my head when I walk through the school gates and see their shining faces and giggles. Whenever I go to meet colleagues or friends and often strangers I try to channel that child like beam on to them! Works a charm ;) TRY IT!
6. Forgive quickly
Arguments can be dramatic at Primary school. Often I see the adults intervening and fretting. I’ve also seen children distraught that a classmate broke their favourite ruler/pencil case/watch etc. But what I also see is quick forgiveness. Like every teacher, I’ve had my moments which were far less than “Miss Honey” shall we say. When I make a mistake, I apologise to the child. I’m always so touched at how quickly they find space in their heart to forgive me. Makes me want to cry a little..
7. Sometimes you're just in the wrong environment
Change of class, teacher, subject can make the child appear completely different. Not to mention changes in their home life. Children don't have much control over their environment but we as adults do. As care takers let's try and optimise the environment so the child can shine. And for ourselves. Recognise when the environment, relationship isn't supporting your growth, and take brave steps.
8. Play deprivation makes you unhappy, unproductive & less successful in relationships FULL STOP.
9. You have to have some struggle for meaningful long lasting learning.
The things we adults do for children, the child does NOT learn. That’s when we make it too easy. Children are little scientists and naturally make hundreds of experiments each day. They love to discover new things themselves! And so do I and I guess so do you too. The thing is with “struggle” is that it requires time to think, to experiment, to get annoyed and frustrated and then finally breakthrough. I learnt that it’s important to allow myself more time and not wish my troubles away or avoid them. The children I worked with inspire me to keep present in the journey.
So those are my top 9 lessons from 9 years of working in a school! There are plenty more and I’m sure you have your own. Let me know in the comments what’s your favourite thing that a child has taught you!
Image credit to <a href='http://www.freepik.com/free-photo/little-girl-covering-her-face_907980.htm'>Designed by Freepik</a> (modified)
When a child is experiencing anxiety, they are stuck in a state of “readiness”. Their bodies are getting ready for action. Their heart rate and breathing rate increases and there is surge in stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline. Their nervous system switches into Sympathetic nervous system which is reactive and prioritises fight or flight. Blood supply rushes to the legs and arms ready to run or fight. When anxiety is persistent children become stuck and will need extra help from caring adults in their life. Seeing your child suffer from anxiety is anxiety provoking in the parents often! A play therapist can help your child move through the anxiety and learnt to self regulate the strong sensations experienced with anxiety.
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